If you were already getting the impression that “this person is not normal”, hello! I have more evidence to confirm your suspicions. True story, I once met one of my most beloved friends now by biting him the first time we encountered each other. As the exuberant Thomas Sanders once said, Story Time.

I had decided to take a social risk and try ballroom dancing. During the first lesson, there was a group of people my age who planned to go grab some pizza across the street after the class and being nice normal people, they invite me, the new person. Knowing myself and my extreme awkwardness I decided to NOT listen to myself and to put myself out there. Theoretically, a great idea and a wonderful opportunity to make friends. But of course, I was part of this equation…and I should have known better.

To finish this story, I need to bring up another friend who at this point is my brother and he is in my contacts as Bro. I met Bro when I was in 8th grade and I also coincidentally met him while dancing. His church was putting on a themed dance and the boy I was dating at the time invited me to meet his best friend. Bro was a whole head shorter than me but had a cowboy hat on that definitely made up for the difference. I don’t remember much of the details except that when my eyes met his bright blue ones, it was instant. My boyfriend was definitely jealous but if he knew what was in our hearts, he would have had no reason to fear. What followed was endless ice cream dates, spinning in circles when we felt unregulated, lots of laying on the ground to listen to music with our souls, and truly my first soul mate. I look back on our time together, all the things we just knew without speaking, our super super autistic regulation ritual we did every time we got together that I still don’t know how it began, and the fact that he was the only boy allowed in my room because my super strict mom somehow knew that there was nothing to worry about. We are both married now to our respective spouses but we still make the time to have our music phone calls every month where we listen to music without speaking for two hours and trade artists. The only explanation I can come up with was that as soon as I met him, my soul felt at home.

Now back to the original story, let’s name the friend involved as L. There was probably 8-10 people at this gathering but the ones I felt closest to after the class was E, across from me, and L seated next to me at my left. Dinner was going smoothly but at some point L leans across me to grab some condiment and what was my first instinct?

“BITE”.

I immediately retracted, thinking to myself “Oh shit, I can’t believe I just did that.” Truly, I don’t know why I am this way either. (Also, when I say bite, I mean put teeth on not actually sink teeth into flesh. He was not harmed, I repeat, I left behind no marks.) What followed was a moment of tense awkwardness, and an exchange of wide eyed glances between E and L, before L politely laughed it off (as the angel he is) and the conversation continued as normal. No one brought it up for the rest of the dinner. Not long after, I excused myself and went home, hanging my head in utter shame at my conduct.

I came back the next week, praying fervently that L would please, please, PLEASE not be there. My prayers went unanswered. There he was, waving at me as soon as I came in while I tried to avoid his gaze. I don’t remember what was said but he has since become one of my closest allies and my favorite dance partner. Now, every time I introduce him to another friend of mine he always starts the conversation by saying “Oh yeah, Bug? The first time I met her, she BIT ME.” It is something I will never live down. I think about our first fateful meeting and I keep asking myself why I did that to a person I just met. My only answer was that my soul felt comfortable with his, he felt like home. Obviously he must have felt that way too because what sane person would choose to be friends with a person who bit them on the first encounter? However, I am eternally grateful that he gave me that chance. Chosen family that choose you back are the some of the greatest blessings life has to offer. I’m grateful for friends that feel like home.

Love, Bug